10 about the most wonderful time of the year

29 03 2011

1.  It’s my favorite time of year in Florida: spring training time!

2.  Dad visits, and we hit baseball games each day.

3.  This year: four (Yankees) games in four days. 

Yankees vs. Blue Jays

4.  AJ Burnett had an ugly outing. Derek Jeter is far from anything remotely ugly.

AJ's u-g-l-y outing

5.  Mariano Rivera pitched a lights-out inning.

6.  Alex Rodriguez hit home runs in two games, but I didn’t see Cameron Diaz, who is supposedly in town to watch her man.

7.  I saw Yogi Berra, who is the cutest man; Reggie Jackson, who isn’t the friendliest of fellas; and Lou Piniella, who is not sweet (as his nickname may lead you to believe). 

8.  I saw Manny Ramirez in a Rays’ uniform, and I liked it.

9.  I saw Johnny Damon in left field for the Rays. I liked it, but he made me miss Carl Crawford.

10.  I avoided sunburn! Huge victory for the extremely pale-skinned girl!


10 things I learned from Charlie Sheen

4 03 2011

1.  There is life (in the form of rock stars) on Mars.

2.  These life forms have tiger blood.

3.  Strafing is a word. It means: to rake (as ground troops) with fire at close range and especially with machine-gun fire from low-flying aircraft.

4.  Black Bart was an infamous Wells Fargo stage-coach robber during California’s gold rush days.

5.  Thomas Jefferson was a weak man (to put it mildly).

6.  Seven-gram rock is a lot of cocaine. Normal people would die if they took this much.

7.  Rock bottom is a fishing term.

8.  The scoreboard never lies.

9.  There is a drug called Charlie Sheen.

10.  Sheep rhymes with sleep, and that’s funny.

Top 10 Charlie Sheen quotes

1 03 2011

1.  “I’m tired of pretending like I’m not bitchin’, a total freakin’ rock star from Mars.”

2.  “I’m still alive, which is pretty cool.”

3.  “Let’s talk about something exciting. Me.”

4.  “I’m bi-winning. I win here, and I win there.”

5.  “Resentments are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber.”

6.  “My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math.”

7.  “I’ve got tiger blood, man.”

8.  “I am on a drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen.”

9.  “Sorry my life is so much more bitchin’ than yours. I planned it that way.”

10.  “Just sit back and enjoy the show.”

Please note: This list is as of March 1, 2011, at 8:06 p.m. Charlie is on a media rampage, and more mind barf is spewing out each day. This list is subject to change after 20/20 tonight.